Stacey-Ann's Blog

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I lost my innocence that beautiful September morning

In many ways I see my life as being divided into 2 parts: pre 9/11/2001 and post 9/11/2001.

The morning of 9/11/2001 started like any other.  I went to work expecting to come home to my husband and chat with my best friend, Angie, on the way home.

Angie and I met in 1992 when I moved into my college dorm room.  I was nervous to be starting college especially since I was in a new country without any of my family and friends nearby.

Angie and I hit it off instantly.  She and her family welcomed me and included me in all their activities.  Angie traveled home with me and took the time to learn my culture and get to know my family.  The most recent trip was in July, 2001 when we went to Jamaica for my dad's 50th birthday.  

Once we got back from Jamaica in August life was very busy.  Angie was traveling a lot for work and preparing to move into her newly renovated office at the Pentagon.

That morning I was busy running around at work until my husband called to say that planes had crashed into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon.  I didn't even fully process the magnitude of what he had said at first until he said "Stacey, what about Angie?" 

I tried to call her but she didn't answer.  That wasn't unusual because personal cell phones weren't allowed inside the Pentagon.  As I was driving home that beautiful afternoon I kept hoping my phone would ring and she would say "Stace, I'm ok!"  That call never came.  Even today, almost 12 years later, I still secretly wish for that call.

Not a day goes by where I don't miss her.  I miss the shared history, those little stories that only she would understand, those memories that only she and I shared.  I miss hearing her voice and her laugh.  So much life has happened in the years since that horrible day and that still sometimes makes me angry.  I sometimes feel so cheated:

  • Cheated out of the opportunity to see her as a mother.
  • Cheated out of the opportunity to have her know my children and have them know her personally.
  • Cheated out of having that "go to girlfriend" who would drop everything to be there for me if I needed her.
  • Cheated out of a lifetime of having her with me.

 

September 11 has been a defining moment in my life:

  • It taught me what real pain was like. 
  • It taught me that I was stronger than I thought, and that I could withstand more than I realized. 
  • It taught me to value the people that are important in your life and to never take their presence for granted. 
  • It taught me to value giving back.  We established a scholarship fund in her honor and working to keep that scholarship thriving has become a central part of my identity.

By far, though, the most important thing it taught me was that it was better to love and lose than to never allow yourself to love at all.  Despite all the pain I felt once she was gone, I would not have traded the chance to get to know and love her.  I would not have traded those 9 years as best friends and all the memories we shared for anything!


I lost my innocence that beautiful September morning.


 



 

 

 

 

 

If you or someone you know would like information about buying, selling, or renting a home in Prince George's, Montgomery,  Charles, Calvert, Anne Arundel, Howard, and/or Baltimore Counties please contact Dr. Stacey-Ann Baugh of Century 21 New Millennium.

 

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Dr. Stacey-Ann Baugh

Century 21 New Millennium

www.LiveinPGCounty.com

staceyannbaugh@gmail.com

240-481-3565 (C)

202-546-0055 (O)

 

FINALLY!  A DOCTOR WHO MAKES HOUSE-CALLS!

 

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Comment balloon 22 commentsDr. Stacey-Ann Baugh • January 13 2013 06:36PM

Comments

So sad for your loss.  You are right, so many wonderful lives were cut short needlessly that dreadful day.  A beautiful post of remembrance.  Thank you for sharing this.

Posted by Paula McDonald, Magnolia Realty ~ Granbury, TX 936-203-0279 (Magnolia Realty ~ Granbury) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann  I cannot begin to understand or feel what you have experienced during 911.  I have worked during the Oklahoma City bombing and other catastrophic events but without a personal connection.  My heart goes out to you for your loss.

Posted by John G. Johnston, An Exclusive Buyer's Agent ~ Westcliffe, CO (John G. Johnston & Associates, LLC) almost 6 years ago

Dr. Stacey-Ann, 9-11-2001 was such a tragic day for our Nation.  The senseless loss of lives and the resulting effects it has on all of us. The loss of individuals who were friends, mothers, brothers, sisters, etc. to someone cannot be measured. The horror of it will remain much more personal to those who lost a loved on on that dreadful day. I feel your pain in reading this. It saddens my heart deeply. This is such a beautiful tribute to Angela. Thank you for participating in the contest.

Posted by Kathleen Daniels, San Jose Homes for Sale-Probate & Trust Specialist (KD Realty - 408.972.1822) almost 6 years ago
Hi Stacey, I cannot even imagine your loss but I pray it was fast for Angie. So many peoples lives were touched by the horrific events of that day and our country will ever be the same. I am sure if Angie can, she is still in your lives but from above. Very sorry and may the pain get easier as time goes on.
Posted by Kristin Hamilton CA Realtor, (909) 557-6966- Specialize 55+ Communties Banning (Sun Lakes Realt) almost 6 years ago

Such a tragic event.  So sorry that you lost such a great friend during that time Stacey.  9-11 had such a huge impact on us individually and as a Nation and this is something we will never forget.  Thank you for sharing such a deep and personal story with us Stacey.  

Posted by Brenda Mullen, Your San Antonio TX Real Estate Agent!! (RE/MAX Access) almost 6 years ago

You were so close to all of the pain and destruction. I'm sorry for your loss. I wish I could say more, but there is nothing that I can say that will make up for your loss.

Posted by Debbie Laity, Your Real Estate Resource for Delta County, CO (Cedaredge Land Company) almost 6 years ago

I remember reading about this. It is heartbreaking story but so full of the love that you have for her. NO ONE can ever take that away! XOXO

Posted by Joni Bailey, Your Huntsville / Lake Livingston Area REALTORĀ® (Berkshire Hathaway Home Services - Anderson Properties) almost 6 years ago

Stancy,

I can understand your loss.Feels sorry for you.

John

Posted by John Cochran, Real Estate Agent (Homebackers.com) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann, thank you for sharing your touching story.  I am so sorry to hear about Angie. How wonderful that you set up a scholarship in her name.  You are a special lady.

Posted by Sharon Parisi, Dallas Homes (United Real Estate Dallas ) almost 6 years ago

Stacy-Ann, what a heart-felt story, and bet you do miss your best friend.   That was a disastrous day for many families, and hope we never have to hear about another one again!

Posted by Joan Cox, Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time (Metro Brokers - House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373) almost 6 years ago

Stacy-Ann,

I will never forget that day, I don't know anyone who was taken that day - but none the less, that day will always stick out in my mind.  To have someone you cared for taken must be three or four times as hard for you each year that 9/11 rolls by.  It still seems like only yesterday.

Posted by Debbie Cook, Silver Spring and Takoma Park Maryland Real Estate (Long & Foster Real Estate, Inc) almost 6 years ago

This is very sad Stacy. . sorry to hear about your loss. .

Posted by Fernando Herboso - Broker for Maxus Realty Group, 301-246-0001 Serving Maryland, DC and Northern VA (Maxus Realty Group - Broker 301-246-0001) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann, Thank You for sharing such heartbreaking experience with us. Our world as we once knew it will never be the same again! I am so sorry for your loss.

Posted by Beth Atalay, Cam Realty of Clermont FL (Cam Realty and Property Management) almost 6 years ago

I understand why it is still so difficult to write about this Stacey-Ann. I'm sure you will carry Angie in your heart forever and hope that the day comes that thinking of her will bring smiles to your face more often than tears. Thanks for sharing your story. 

Posted by Julie Bentley, Saint Johns, FL REALTOR (Watson Realty Corp, Jacksonville, FL ) almost 6 years ago

I have a client who was there that day and almost jumped into the Hudson to avoid the poisonous smoke, but he kept walking and got into the clear.  Thank you for your share of this experience.  Writing it gets it off your chest.  There are people in this world who enjoy hurting others.

Posted by Bruce Hicks, Your Lifetime Friend/Helper! (Best Homes Hawaii) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann, this must have been difficult to write, and we feel for you as a nation.  Thank you for sharing and know how proud we are of Angie, too, for working and sacrificing for our freedom.  Something like this is always senseless, but she died a true hero.

Posted by MaryKay Shumway, Door County Wisconsin's Real Estate Expert (The Kellstrom Ray Agency, Inc. (Est. 1948)) almost 6 years ago

Paula - shame how many lost their lives that day

John - thanks

Kathleen - this is a great contest

Kristin - we have been told it was very swift - that does bring some comfort

Brenda - thanks

Debbie - thank.  It was hard to be so close geographically and emotionally

Joni - thanks.  I love knowing that she is always with me

John - Thanks

Posted by Dr. Stacey-Ann Baugh, A doctor who makes house calls. (Century 21 New Millennium) almost 6 years ago

Sharon - thanks so much for that.  The scholarship has been an awesome addition to my life

Joan - we can only hope that there is never a day like that again

Debbie - 9/11 is always hard but at least I know that everyone remembers

Fernando - thanks

Beth - it truly is a different world than it was before that day

Julie - thankfully, i'm now at a point where I smile more than I cry

Bruce - I can imagine how frightening it must have been for your client to be there

MaryKay - she is indeed a hero

Posted by Dr. Stacey-Ann Baugh, A doctor who makes house calls. (Century 21 New Millennium) almost 6 years ago

Stacey,

This is a gripping story that tugs at the heart. Angie was a beautiful friend, a treasure for life here on earth and now in Heaven. It's hard to lose your best friend. I have lost two, one was a childhood friend; the other an adult. Neither one was easy to accept. 9/11 was a National tragedy and it never should have destroyed the number of lives it did - but it did and people like you go on. Yet it's so hard. I look at that photograph of two young, intelligent girls who shared secrets and planned a future. This was not the way the story should have ended but it did. Setting up a scholarship in her name was a wonderful way to keep her memory alive.

May God bless you. I know that when you look up at the stars at night Angie is looking down at you.

Posted by Patricia Feager, Selling Homes Changing Lives (DFW FINE PROPERTIES) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann, I am sorry about your loss.  So many lives changed that day in an instant.  I can recall that day as vividly as yesterday. It is hard to forget such a devastating event. Thank you for sharing Angela's memory with us.

Posted by Anja Kerstens, GRI, CDPE, CHS, ASP, Selling Silicon Valley Real (Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage) almost 6 years ago
By experiencing pain and loss we cherish the good things so much more. I don't take for granted many things from simple to grand.
Posted by Pete Xavier, Outstanding Agent Referrals-Nationwide (Investments to Luxury) almost 6 years ago

Stacey-Ann, what a poignant story--you have wonderful memories but, as you said, you lost so much that tragic day.  Thank you for sharing your story--what a wonderful tribute to Angie too.

Posted by Debe Maxwell, CRS, Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods (www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310) almost 6 years ago

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